Yellow Wallpaper

The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion This was an interesting read. It's as close to 'pure' creative nonfiction as you can get: Didion uses writing to work through her grief after the sudden death of her husband. There aren't any big lessons or morals, just exploration of thoughts, ideas, and memories. The Big Rock Candy Mountain by Wallace Stegner Yes, I've been on a bit of a Stegner kick lately. I plan on reading even more after this, so be prepared. This one started slowly and I wasn't sure about it for the first hundred pages or so. Then it really started to pull me in and I could barely put it down. I can tell it's an earlier work and I didn't think it was quite as polished as some of his later ones, but it's still a good book just the same. Stones from the River by Ursula Hegi I've had this book on my list for years, but for some reason it just never sounded interesting to me. It turned out to be one of those books that you miss wh...

I was reading a magazine a little while ago in the doctor's office that suggested the idea of monthly resolutions. Rather than making a few big goals at the beginning of the year, make one or two small improvements each month. In theory, you should be able to incrementally build up good habits by focusing on one thing for a time before adding something else. I've been thinking about this idea for a while, especially since the beginning of this year hasn't been a good time to do much besides nurture a baby. I have a few health-related changes I'd like to make, but it seems like the timing will be better later in the year when I am more fully recovered and when the weather is better. I also like this idea because I feel like I have so many changes I'd like to make. For the last few years I've lived in a bit of a fog, just getting by until the next big move or other change. Now that we're more settled I want to spend more time on myself. Some of my goals that I...

Even though things have been kind of crazy with the move and the new baby we've still been trying to talk about a country every week. Most weeks we've just read a few books, colored the flag, and had some food that's somewhat related to the country we're talking about. So far the kids are still having fun and they really like learning new things. Canada: I wasn't really sure what to cook for Canada, so we ended up having baked salmon with rice pilaf. The kids really liked the salmon and they liked learning about the fact that Canada is close to the United States and that they have two official languages. China: I found a bunch of different books about China at the library and we found some coloring pages about Chinese animals as well. For our dinner I made these noodles as well as some stir-fried tofu with veggies and rice. The kids really wanted to try chopsticks, so they didn't end up eating much of their dinner because it was too hard. We also checked out a ...

This should be the point where I say "wow, the last two weeks have really gone by fast!" They haven't, really; the days (and nights) have been kind of long but the time does seem to have flown. I've been trying to take a Zen-like approach to life and slow down my usual anxiousness by thinking 'one day at a time', so a total of fourteen days does seem like a lot. Now I'm looking forward to the next milestone: one month. While I'm anxious for P. Bibby to get bigger, I'm mostly anxious for my body to get better and so I can get back to 'normal' (hah!). Mr. Fob has a lot going on with work and I feel somewhat stressed about adding childcare, cooking, cleaning, and shopping on top of all that. I don't think he minds too much, but I hate feeling useless. And, weirdly enough, I miss grocery shopping. A break from that is good for my budget at least. I did go in for my two-week check at the OB today and everything looks good so far. My incision...

This post has a specific purpose, which is to ask advice from my readers who have successfully (or unsuccessfully) nursed babies in the past. If you haven't, you're still welcome to read, but consider yourself warned. I nursed S-Boogie for an entire year before she weaned. I generally felt that things went well, although she did not gain a lot of weight very quickly. With Little Dude we got to about four months or so before I realized that his extreme fussiness was probably related to hunger and we switched to a bottle because I couldn't get the supply back up. There were a lot of things going on in my life at the time, including a major move and his emergency delivery, so I'm not surprised that my body flaked out on me. Since then, however, I've been doing a little research on hypoplastic breasts, which are basically those that don't have enough milk-producing tissue. A big sign of that is the fact that they don't change size during pregnancy (mine don'...

The thing about a planned c-section is that it makes for a pretty boring birth story. Not much action and suspense, although since we had that last time with Little Dude's birth I'm pretty happy that this time around was a bit more boring. This baby still needs a blog name--Mr. Fob thinks she should be P Bibby, but I don't really like that so I'll have to think of something better. I just thought I'd write down a bit about how things went so we'll remember them in the future. Last Wednesday morning we had to be at the hospital by six o'clock; thankfully Mr. Fob's sister was nice enough to get up early and stay with our kids during the morning. My surgery was the second on the schedule so we didn't get into the operating room until after eight. The nurse who worked with me that day was really great and we spent the prep time chatting. By the time I went in for surgery both Mr. Fob and I felt relaxed and excited. Everything went well; it's not a pl...

I've been counting down until February 4th for quite some time now, so when the doctor's office called yesterday to reschedule I'll admit that I wasn't quite happy. Even though we're having the baby a day earlier than we thought I've still been stressed because it's a change of plans. Yes, people, I am that neurotic. But, like it or not, the baby has to come out and the time has come. Today I alternated between being excited and having wierd panic attacks about having a baby. I kept having to remind myself that this is scheduled, it's happening on time, I'm not bleeding to death, I'm not in the middle of graduate school, people are available to help with the kids, and so on. I though I was over the stress of the last time around, but I guess not. And I always stress when I have to leave my kids and house in the care of others, no matter what the reason. Hopefully tomorrow will just go smoothly and holding our sweet new baby will make up for every...

The 'nesting instinct' is a common trope of pregnancy; there's something about a new baby that triggers women to want to clean, purge, organize, and otherwise get everything 'perfect' for their new arrival. I have been feeling that a bit of late, though moving last month certainly helped to quash most of my desires to do any heavy cleaning or organizing. I'm not much of a decorator and we don't have a designated nursery so I haven't done much of that kind of nesting either. For some reason this time around my nesting instincts have gone in an entirely different direction: food storage. This doesn't surprise me that much. I've always found it easier to blow money on food (boxes of cereal are easier to justify than new clothes or furniture), and we just moved into a new house with a lot more storage room. Several local grocery stores had their case-lot sales last month and so I indulged a bit. I do think food storage is important and right now I...