Too Tired to Leap
I really can't let leap day pass by without writing a post about it, since it only happens every four years. I'm curious to see what my life will be like four years from now--hopefully I'll still have a blog, and even if I don't I'll be able to go back and read this and reflect. In four years I'll have kids that are 16, 13, and 10! That feels old to me. I wrote a post in 2008 that reflected on what my life had been like in 2004, and in some ways it wasn't all that different four years later. We were still in school, still didn't have a lot of money, and probably spent too much time waiting for 'real life' to happen (well, I know I did). Really, 2008 was mostly a good year and a lot of nice things happened.
I did write again in 2012, but it wasn't consciously a leap day post. In fact, it was more processing a lot of feelings about the divorce. I feel a little weird going back and reading it now, but it had only been about six months out and things were still adjusting. I was also feeling nervous about the future since I still hadn't gotten a job yet, and the kids were pretty little. Four years later, things are better in some ways. I can honestly say that emotionally I'm doing a lot better. I feel like I've mostly moved on and that Mr. Fob and I are mostly successfully co-parenting; sometimes I get a little bogged down in my mind going back over the past and all the things that could have gone better, but at this point there's not much I can do about it. I've also found a good job (finally) and have a career path in sight, which helps a lot. Four years later I'm still not that excited about working full-time, especially not for the next 30 years until I can retire, but I always feel weird feeling that way since staying at home basically meant I spent a lot of time reading and cooking and was kind of lazy. I do miss having more time to spend with the kids, especially in the summer. But, again, I can waste time on getting upset about the ways my life isn't the way I planned, or I can just live with it. At least if I have to work I have a steady, secure job with a decent paycheck and great coworkers--and I'm doing something fun and personally fulfilling.
So how was leap day today in 2016? Very, very normal, at least for my life as it is now. I was pretty tired because for some reason I had trouble falling asleep last night, which is frustrating. I generally get up at around 6:30 and get right in the shower. The two older kids wake themselves up, get dressed, and get their own breakfast, and are usually by the time I come in the kitchen to get my food. I tend to eat in my room while on the computer reading blog posts and news. After I've eaten, I wake up P.Bibby and help her with breakfast; while she's eating, I go blow dry my hair, get my clothes on, and do my makeup. S. Boogie leaves earlier than the other two since she has to catch the bus to the middle school. At about 8:15, the two younger kids walk out the door to school and then I get in the car and drive to work. Work today was pretty normal--I cataloged some books, opened some boxes and checked things in (we got a cool bible from 1526 that was pretty exciting to hold in my hands for a little while before passing it on), chatted with friends at work, created some invoices, etc. That's how most of my work days go. I got a new chair on Friday and my back was very grateful today. After work I came home, changed my clothes, and made dinner with Little Dude as my helper since it was his turn. Then P. Bibby got in the bath while I cleaned up the kitchen. I have to help her with lotion and brushing her hair after the bath, but the older two kids are self-sufficient. After P. Bibby was ready, we ate some treats from last night's FHE while I read Harry Potter. Then scriptures, family prayer, and tucking the littlest in bed before the other two went off to shower. I got on the computer to check in on my homework, read some Facebook, and write this blog post. And now I'm going to go to bed. It feels like a lot when I type it up, and in some ways it really is. On the other hand, it's just life--eating, and cleaning, and working, and spending time together. Sometimes I wish we had a little more time to just relax and hang out, but I'll be grateful for a boring, ordinary day. I wonder how much will change in four more years? I'll have to check in then and let you know.
I did write again in 2012, but it wasn't consciously a leap day post. In fact, it was more processing a lot of feelings about the divorce. I feel a little weird going back and reading it now, but it had only been about six months out and things were still adjusting. I was also feeling nervous about the future since I still hadn't gotten a job yet, and the kids were pretty little. Four years later, things are better in some ways. I can honestly say that emotionally I'm doing a lot better. I feel like I've mostly moved on and that Mr. Fob and I are mostly successfully co-parenting; sometimes I get a little bogged down in my mind going back over the past and all the things that could have gone better, but at this point there's not much I can do about it. I've also found a good job (finally) and have a career path in sight, which helps a lot. Four years later I'm still not that excited about working full-time, especially not for the next 30 years until I can retire, but I always feel weird feeling that way since staying at home basically meant I spent a lot of time reading and cooking and was kind of lazy. I do miss having more time to spend with the kids, especially in the summer. But, again, I can waste time on getting upset about the ways my life isn't the way I planned, or I can just live with it. At least if I have to work I have a steady, secure job with a decent paycheck and great coworkers--and I'm doing something fun and personally fulfilling.
So how was leap day today in 2016? Very, very normal, at least for my life as it is now. I was pretty tired because for some reason I had trouble falling asleep last night, which is frustrating. I generally get up at around 6:30 and get right in the shower. The two older kids wake themselves up, get dressed, and get their own breakfast, and are usually by the time I come in the kitchen to get my food. I tend to eat in my room while on the computer reading blog posts and news. After I've eaten, I wake up P.Bibby and help her with breakfast; while she's eating, I go blow dry my hair, get my clothes on, and do my makeup. S. Boogie leaves earlier than the other two since she has to catch the bus to the middle school. At about 8:15, the two younger kids walk out the door to school and then I get in the car and drive to work. Work today was pretty normal--I cataloged some books, opened some boxes and checked things in (we got a cool bible from 1526 that was pretty exciting to hold in my hands for a little while before passing it on), chatted with friends at work, created some invoices, etc. That's how most of my work days go. I got a new chair on Friday and my back was very grateful today. After work I came home, changed my clothes, and made dinner with Little Dude as my helper since it was his turn. Then P. Bibby got in the bath while I cleaned up the kitchen. I have to help her with lotion and brushing her hair after the bath, but the older two kids are self-sufficient. After P. Bibby was ready, we ate some treats from last night's FHE while I read Harry Potter. Then scriptures, family prayer, and tucking the littlest in bed before the other two went off to shower. I got on the computer to check in on my homework, read some Facebook, and write this blog post. And now I'm going to go to bed. It feels like a lot when I type it up, and in some ways it really is. On the other hand, it's just life--eating, and cleaning, and working, and spending time together. Sometimes I wish we had a little more time to just relax and hang out, but I'll be grateful for a boring, ordinary day. I wonder how much will change in four more years? I'll have to check in then and let you know.
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