Happy 2 Months to Little Dude

On Friday Little Dude turned 2 months old. Sometimes it feels like the last two months have dragged, and sometimes it feels like they've flown by. This last month has been harder than the first. After the first few weeks I distinctly remember thinking "I'm glad he's not very colicky". Ha ha. The last four weeks or so have been pretty difficult, since he usually isn't very happy unless someone is holding him. He also has bad gas and doesn't stay asleep easily at all. The other night we tried going out for Indian food, but my mom and I had to leave dinner early and take him home because he was too tired and freaking out. But, we're all still alive and he's slowly getting bigger and better.

He has learned to sleep better at night, and I'm really hoping it's not just some magical effect of being at Grandma and Grandpa's house. Also, when he's awake and in a good mood he's quite smiley and cute. He's getting nice and chubby and has a very sweet little smile and intent little gaze. The other night my dad was holding him and he was just contently looking around the room. Then he saw me, and his eyes locked on mine and he started wiggling up and down and making little noises. At least he loves me enough to show it.

Boobie juice

I read an article in the New York Times some time ago about how the government is considering putting a warning label on formula, similar to that on cigarettes, that warns that breastfeeding is always preferable and that feeding your baby formula may have lasting consequences. Even though I totally agree that breastfeeding is better for a lot of reasons, I thought that might be a little extreme. Like a lot of things, I don't think legislating against formula is really going to make a difference. Unfortunately, our society is not set up to be very supportive of breastfeeding. For example, in some countries like Norway, women get a year of paid maternity leave (OK, they also have subsidized health care and high taxes, too). Here we barely get six weeks. And if you go back to work there usually isn't a lot of support for pumping. Even if there is, pumping all day is hard work and difficult to maintain. Plus there is a lot of double speak out there--everyone will tell you "breast is best", but then turn around and constantly emphasize "but it's your choice". Then they send you home from the hospital with a free can of formula and coupons for more. In a lot of other countries they will send a home nurse around to check on how breastfeeding and other baby care is going. Here they do offer lactation clinics, but you have to have the guts to call and ask for help. Breastfeeding is a natural process, but surprisingly difficult to get the hang of for the first few weeks, and very few people acknowledge that fact. There seems to be a lot of ambivalence about breastfeeding--most advocates I know are somewhat apologetic about saying that it's better for fear of offending anyone. And, surprisingly, many women who do breastfeed aren't all that comfortable about it either. Which brings me to this recent article. I was surprised by how many people were so bothered by the picture, especially since many of them are mothers. It really is hard to feed in public, because most people are squeamish about it. When a baby is feeding, you don't see any nipple. Heck, most of the time you don't see anything, especially if Mom can work her shirt right. The other day I thought it ironic that in the middle of a casino that had an enormous billboard of a lady's butt on the front (and was right next door to the "Hooters" casino) I had people staring at me for sitting in a bench inside the ladies restroom feeding my baby. I am a lot more confident now than I was with my first kid, and yet I still feel a little weird trying to feed a squirming baby under a blanket. A lot of times I honestly don't care, and if I'm in a somewhat private place I just let him eat without the blanket since it's hard trying to juggle everything. It would be nice if people were polite enough to just look away (most actually do) or to smile and think "how nice that she's feeding her baby". I see people's breasts, and even their nipples, hanging out all the time. For some reason having a baby attached to the breast makes it suddenly taboo. Maybe if we had more photos like this one out there it would help.

No, I haven't melted yet

When I went out to eat breakfast on the patio this morning, the thermometer said it was 99 degrees. At 8 in the morning. Vegas is HOT! But, we're having a good time despite the heat. I've spent a lot of time inside the house hanging with Little Dude. S-Boogie doesn't care about the heat and loves to be outside. She's spent a bunch of time in the pool with Grandpa. I realized last night that her hair is starting to feel like straw, but at least it hasn't turned green yet.

Yesterday we went down to the Strip to see a travelling exhibit that's currently at the Tropicana casino. It's called "Bodies" and features presereved human bodies and organs that have been plasticized. I was worried that it would be gross, but it was actually very fascinating. S-Boogie wasn't that interested in it, though, and Little Dude just slept in the snuggli the whole time. After looking at the exhibit we walked over to the MGM Grand and ate lunch at the Rainforest Cafe. S-Boogie liked that a lot more. Real human bodies are not interesting, animatronic elephants are. Hmm... On our way back to the car we stopped by the lion habitat (every casino has to have something cool--MGM has real lions) to see them for a minute. S-Boogie yelled "Hey lion, look at my shirt, it's green!". The lion, unfortunately, didn't seem very impressed.

That was probably the extent of our touristing for this trip. We might go do one other thing later in the week, but it's so hot and yucky out there. Plus the Strip just isn't worth it for me. Too crowded, noisy and expensive. My parents' house has plenty to do, and luckily S-Boogie thinks that the pool is better than anything else out there. Little Dude just likes the ceiling fans.

Memorable quotes from S-Boogie

"Look at me, I'm swimming!" (Said this morning after breakfast while floating in the pool with grandpa. I think we're going to be hearing this a lot over the next week or so)

"Kitty cat, you want to go swimming?"

"Can I have some chocolate, Mommy?" (This was said through a mouthful of chocolate after she grabbed a Ferrero Rocher off the countertop)

"There's poop in my sleeping bag!" (The reason why today's nap didn't go so well. Luckily Mommy was busy, so Daddy got to deal with that particular mess.)

We're getting this trip off to a fabulous start!

New House Rules

1. Please tell someone as soon as you poop in your diaper (i.e. don't wait until Mom notices poop running down your leg, and then don't try to keep denying it even when it's that obvious).

2. Don't pick up any spiders, ants, earwigs, etc. while playing outside (I really don't want her to get bitten by something weird).

3. The baby does not eat any food yet, especially goldfish crackers (at least he knows enough to spit it back out when offered).

Waiting...

Lately I feel like I'm waiting for everything. Waiting for this stupid heat wave to end. Waiting for my baby to learn how to sleep without someone holding him, or how to sleep more than two hours at a time, or how to be awake without screaming. Waiting for S-Boogie to be a little less stubborn and a little more comprehensible. Waiting for my stomach to go away so I have clothes that fit. Waiting for Master Fob to get a better job so I can buy new clothes. Waiting to find out what we're going to be doing this fall, where we will be living and where Master Fob will be working. All this waiting is stressing me out!

At least one thing we're waiting for is actually getting closer to happening. We're going down to my parents' house in Las Vegas on Thursday. My youngest brother, P, is coming home from Russia on Wednesday and we're all getting together to celebrate (I bet he's going to be pretty weirded out since Vegas is pretty much the complete opposite of Russia). Master Fob is coming back up here next Monday, but I'm staying down there for at least another week. Even if it's hotter than Hades, it will be a nice break for all of us. Plus they have a pool and air conditioning. Even more importantly, according to S-Boogie, they have a kitty cat. I'm just looking forward to having other people to hold and soothe the child. Speaking of which, he's actually sleeping peacefully in his little bed, which means that I need to get into mine. Maybe tonight will be the restful night I've been waiting for...

The Dilemma

A few years ago we decided that for birthdays and Christmas our kids would each receive three gifts: a new toy, a new book, and something to wear. I like the fact that limiting gifts forces us to be thoughtful about what we get her, it's easier on our budget, and it keeps events from dragging on through massive present orgies. I also like the fact that other people get her presents too, and I don't want grandma and grandpa feeling like they can't get her anything because she already has so much stuff. And more than anything we want special days to focus on the celebration and other traditions, not the loot. So far, this has worked out well for S-Boogie and for us. I don't think that she has an excessive amount of stuff, and she plays with and enjoys most of the things she has.

I just realized that her birthday is coming up in a few weeks and I have no idea what we're going to get her this year. I really like simple toys that encourage imaginative, creative play and that don't involve a lot of loud noises or gimmicks. I also really hate cheap toys that fall apart or break easily and I'm not a big fan of character tie-ins or Barbies. Right now she totally loves playing with her Duplos, her Mr. Potato Head (and his bucket of parts), and just playing elaborate imaginative things with her duckie and her baby doll. Two things I'm considering are a little train set like the one The Big O has, because she enjoyed playing with his or some furniture to play with her dolly, like this or this. Hmm, good thing I still have some time to decide...

A compliment, I think

Last night my stomach started to hurt after dinner, and I realized that the culprit was probably my pants that don't quite fit yet (unfortunately all the maternity stuff is falling off, so I'm pretty much stuck with no pants right now). During S-Boogie's bath I slipped into our bedroom to put on a pair of sweatpants. When I came back in the bathroom she looked at me and said, "Ooh, Mom, those are nice pants!". I'm glad someone thinks I look good in sweatpants.

Also, the demon baby seems to have calmed down quite a bit. I think he was having a growth spurt, which my favorite reassuring book tells me is quite common at six weeks of age. When that happens, baby will want to eat more frequently to satisfy his increased hunger, and unfortunately it usually takes a few days for supply to match demand. Last night and the one before were much better and he's taking longer naps. There is still a fair amount of fussiness, though. He really doesn't seem to like being awake, but will fight sleep until he gets overtired and screaming. I hope he gets to the point of realizing that the world is a fun and interesting place soon. He's already six weeks old though, so time is flying. It won't be long before he's more of a "person". I think I got a bit of a smile the other day, and he will intently focus on you if you catch him in a good mood.

Running errands and finding bargains

Master Fob had a few hours at home between his two jobs today, so I got to escape the house to run a few little errands I've been needing to do. My first stop was The Good Earth, where I was looking for powdered yogurt starter. It's actually a little cheaper to start yogurt with a bit of already made stuff, but I always forget to save some over and it's surprisingly hard to find those little containers that have the plain stuff in them. I also discovered some brie cheese on clearance in the dairy case--99 cents for an eight ounce wheel! If you are anywhere near Orem, run down to The Good Earth and buy some today (especially since it's marked "sell by July 11").

Then I went to a paper supply store and finally found the right size of envelopes for our cute little baby announcements we got printed up (an easy way to DIY--just get a cute photo, use a photo editor to add some text about the baby, and have Costco make reprints, it's easy and cheap). Since I was close to D.I., I thought I'd pop in and see if they happened to have a replacement jar for our blender. Unfortunately they didn't, but I couldn't resist browsing the clothes. Not only did I find a super cute corduroy a-line skirt, I got a nice blouse to go with it. And a practically new t-shirt from Old Navy (since, um, I really need more t-shirts).

I'm usually not that into shopping, but it was nice to get out of the house for a little bit. And I'm really glad I got some new clothes, because my wardrobe is in sad shape lately. Plus I did it all without busting our budget!

So many questions

What is it that compels me to call my child things like "Mr. Man" or "Hungry Bug"? And why do we have to say these things in such a cutsie little voice?

Also, why has my baby been possessed by demons sometime during the last 48 hours and will not stop screaming?

Book Reviews

The Optimistic Child by Martin E. Seligman.
This book caught my eye at the BYU library while I was looking for something else. It was probably due to the fact that it was one of the few paperbacks on the shelf, so it stuck out. The subtitle of the book promises that it is based on a "proven program" that will help prevent kids from becoming depressed. I was a little skeptical of that premise, given that most true depression is due to a chemical imbalance, but after reading the book I think he has some really good ideas for changing behavior and thinking patterns, which can certainly help people deal with their depression. The idea behind the book is that teaching children the techniques used in cognitive behavioral therapy will help them deal with life in a more positive way and in a way "depression-proof" them. Like I said, I don't think that any amount of thinking techniques can completely eliminate some forms of depression, but I think he has some good points. The book is based on a program he and colleagues developed and administered to fifth and sixth graders in Philadelphia, which is the perfect age because kids are old enough to understand how to look at their own thought processes but not yet into that early adolescence stage that doesn't want to talk about anything. Most of the things in the book are things like learning how to pinpoint generalizations and stereotypes about yourself, decatastrophizing, problem solving, etc. He also recommends being proactive about teaching kids good social skills before they enter junior high and high school. These include things like assertiveness, negotiation and empathy. One of the things he reiterates over and over is that parents need to model these kinds of behaviors in order to encourage them in their children. That went along with something I've been realizing more and more lately: parenting needs to be a deliberate exercise. You've got to have clear goals in mind for where you want your kids to end up. Also, even though you can't be perfect, you've got to be the adult and try to model adult behavior. Overall, I liked this book and I think he had many good ideas. I don't know if I would use many of the specific exercises with my kids (some seem kind of complex and contrived), but I hope I can work some of these ways of thinking and looking at things into my own life and the way I deal with my children.

The Weather Makers by Tim Flannery
There are quite a few books on global warming out there, but I've heard a lot of good things about this one and it is one of the most recent. I thought it was well written, very engaging, and quite convincing. I will admit to skimming a little in a few parts, because that is a bad habit of mine when I encounter dense scientific jargon, but it was generally easy to read. I haven't read much else about climate change, but he seemed to cover a lot of territory and look at many different angles. I was realizing as I read that one big problem with environmental issues is that they really are a global concern, but most of us really only care about what is happening locally to us. I don't live in the Arctic, where villages are being moved because the permafrost is melting, or in the tropics where coral reefs are all dying off. And as much as I care about coral reefs, it's hard to think about them every time I fire up my air conditioner or drive my car somewhere. But, this book was a good reminder about what is at stake and the fact that climate change does affect me and that I can do something about it. I think I'll start by walking to church instead of driving, now that I'm getting better. It's better to do something than nothing.