Foxy the Iconoclast

The other day we were putting up our Christmas decorations and S-Boogie asked about the stockings. She thought they were pretty cool, and of course asked what they were for. I started to say that Santa would fill them with goodies, but I couldn't say it. It's not true--Santa doesn't exist and it's Mom and Dad who will fill them with treats (she'll probably actually get some real candy this year too). So I told her something like "When you wake up on Christmas morning, there will be treats in your stocking". I just couldn't tell her that Santa will be bringing her stuff.

Every Christmas the Santa issue raises it's head again. It's a complicated one for me, and my response to it is evolving and will keep evolving as my kids get older. Part of the problem is that I'm really bad at pretending to believe something that I don't. I'm a terrible actress, I can't lie to save my life, and I always feel uncomfortable on Halloween because I really don't like dressing up. It just makes me feel weird. I can't get enthusiastic about Santa because he doesn't exist, and I have a hard time pretending that he does. I don't really remember ever believing in Santa. He wasn't a big deal in my house, and though each Christmas morning we'd awake to full stockings and one unwrapped present that was ostensibly from him, I didn't feel thrilled by the magic of some random fat man breaking into my house to leave stuff for me. Besides, how could he really manufacture My Little Ponies in his workshop when "Made in Hong Kong" is stamped on their little hooves? I was never much into magic as a kid--I preferred to read nonfiction and never touched fantasy books until I got talked into reading Lord of the Rings a few years ago (I did enjoy it, by the way). Santa was kept low-key in my house, and we didn't do the Easter Bunny at all. We did do the Tooth Fairy, but I never really got excited about that one either.

Of course, my mom is the one who didn't tell us about Halloween for years because she didn't want us to have the candy. I'm actually very grateful to her for keeping our Christmas traditions centered around Christ and serving other people. I think all of us who grew up in my family remember things like getting out the fifty bazillion nativity sets, having a party to decorate the tree, driving around to see the lights, and baking cookies to take to our friends and neighbors. To me, that's what Christmas is all about. I know a lot of people say that Santa is all about giving and stuff, but it's not for me. I don't like the commercial aspect of it, the encouraging kids to earn their presents through good behavior, the general focus on stuff. When I asked S-Boogie what she wanted for Christmas this year, she replied "A tree". Well, we got one. Mission accomplished.

At the same time, I'm trying hard not to be the Grinch who spoils Christmas for other people. What I'm trying to do is downplay Santa and play up the other aspects of the season. I choose not to take S-Boogie to the mall to see him, but I'm not going to picket him or anything like that. We don't have Santa decorations, except for a Santa hat that S-Boogie loves wearing. She likes it because she thinks it's a nightcap like the one Pooh wears. Her grandma sent her a very nice nativity set that she can play with, and she is now obsessed with her "shepherds" and her very own baby Jesus (thank you, grandma, by the way).

So far S-Boogie has not asked to go to the mall to see Santa, because she doesn't really know about him yet. The other day, however, she was praying and asked very fervently to "get to go see Baby Jesus". Hmm, we'll have to see what we can do about that one...

Comments

Anonymous said…
I don't take my kids to the mall Santa, either. I checked out the baby food book from the library and am so sad I didn't have it two years ago.
12/14/2006 2:56 PM
Lady Steed said…
Big O told me that Santa would be bringing him a bike. I told him that just might be. If he chooses to believe in Santa than I will let him.
Though Big O is definitely scared of Santa. At the ward Christmas party Big O had no interest in going up to sit on Santa's lap and get a treat.Every time we asked him he got a very nervous look on his face and tried to hide.
12/14/2006 6:30 PM
Earth Sign Mama said…
Every two/three year-old to whom I've been Mommy was terrified of Santa. He's really scary to that size of person. But, I didn't emphasize Santa much, because I wanted my children to learn to be "good" because they loved God and wanted to please Him. As a teacher of nine year-olds, I'm really careful: I don't want to be the one who louses up their Christmas forever. So, I just say in reply: "Of course I believe in Santa! Why not?" A vague answer that the listener can interpret anyway they choose.

Thank you Foxy for the Valentine on Christmas. I was hoping that my children could have great memories of Christmas--I do--and it's good to pass it on to the next generation. Christmas is so awesome because it gives everyone an excuse to be a little kinder at least once a year.
12/14/2006 8:37 PM
Anonymous said…
My oldest daughter, who is probably about your age now, did not go trick-or-treating until the year she was 4. Later, worried about the wisdom of my kids having so much candy, we called on the "Candy Witch". If you leave your bag of candy out on the back porch on Halloween night, she will take it away and leave you a nice toy! We let them choose 2 or 3 pieces to save, but the rest went to the Candy Witch. Then my husband took the candy to his office. We also called the ice cream truck the "music truck" for years. My oldest didn't catch on to the fact that the music truck sold ice cream until she was 5 or 6! We did the Santa thing, but I was never very enthusiastic about it and I think it became obvious pretty early on that mom and dad were "Santa". I too, felt uncomfortable about playing up something that wasn't real. I haven't discussed it with them recently, but I don't think any of them feel deprived. My youngest is now 19 and we still do stockings just for fun. And I always put the biggest orange I can find in the toe of each stocking because that's what my parents did for me.
12/16/2006 8:31 AM
skyeJ said…
I liked Santa and the Tooth Fairy because it was a fun game. That's all it was. I never felt upset when I realized it was just Mom. It was kind of fun to realize that Mom was really the one putting money in the tooth pillow. It was like she was trying to play with us instead of just make us food and wash our clothes. (Not that I felt like Mom never played with us.) It was just fun to have a special game like Santa or the Tooth Fairy.
12/17/2006 6:38 AM
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