I need some answers

Little Dude, why have you suddenly decided that 6:30 is a great time to wake up? And why does that make you so cranky? We don't like being awakened in the pitch black early morning by shrieking. It's obviously not working for you either since you spend the rest of the morning whining and acting sleepy.

S-Boogie, why is going to the bathroom such a difficult thing to do? Why is it easier to just wait for hours and hours until you wet your pants? Why did I find the toilet full of pee this morning with no evidence of toilet paper? And why did you freak out when I asked you to go back and flush and wash your hands? I wasn't accusing you of a major crime, just a lack of basic hygiene.

Both of you, why does the fact that Mommy wants a little privacy in the bathroom or a few minutes to eat breakfast induce such angst? Why can't I just blow dry my hair or eat a bowl of cereal without two bawling children clinging to my leg?

Comments

Carina said…
I asked myself these questions this very morning.

Dear World,
One of the reasons that new moms can be a little, uhm, fluffy, is that sometimes you have to choose between exercising, or having your children SCREAM at you from beyond the gate while you're on the treadmill. So, I'm not sure when I'll drop those pounds, because 10 minutes of running through the screams isn't going to help anybody.
Jenny said…
When you find the answers to these questions, do share. I have similar issues.
Lindsay said…
Good questions. I wish I had answers for you.
Desmama said…
Your children and mine too. DesTot especially on the potty. Maybe our kids could have a support group together and we could listen in and figure out some answers. Or exorcise the hygiene-and-wake-up-time demons. Or something.
AmyJane said…
Yeah. Patrick's all about the 6:30 wake up call too. We've finally given up trying...it just seems to be his natural wake up time and nothing we can do is changing it. Yuck. Seven is just SO much more reasonable.
M said…
One of those days.

If it matters, I still love you! :-)
Kailey said…
Ahhh, to have the answers to these questions... I bet it's all because of HOW MUCH they LOVE their Mom! ANYTHING to get attention! Even the bad attention is good attention sometimes (psych. 101). But with regards to the early rising, is he possibly teething or sick, or waking up out of the covers and cold?
Cricket said…
age old questions of parenthood... I wish you luck in the answers
Courtney said…
Wow. I just laughed out loud in horror at what I am getting myself in to. If you find answers, please post them asap!-- so when my kids start doing that I know what's going on.
Earth Sign Mama said…
There's an old folk song, I think Pete Seger sings it--
"Because Because Because"--it's the answer to all of life's questions. (I know this isn't any help at all. But it's the first thing that popped into my head when I read this plaintive post.)
S-Boogie said…
Dear Mother,

If you have to ask, then you wouldn't understand even if I explained it.

Love,

S-Boogie
Samantha said…
I'm sending you a book (because books make everything better). It's won't help you understand, or give you any answers--but you'll understand, and with any luck it will make you laugh.

Upside: It takes about five minutes to read.
Downside: You might end up like me, wishing to share it with every mother in the world.

Look for it in the mail, direct from Amazon. :)
svoid said…
One of my co-workers recommended this book to me. He swore by it. In it, the author argues that, albeit counter intuitive, that sometimes when a child wakes up too early it's because he goes to bed too late. Try an earlier bedtime. Of course, considering that I'm not even a parent myself yet, I'm not speaking from experience... just quoting the book :)
FoxyJ said…
Svoid--

I've actually read that book and really like it. I was going to recommend it to you :) The kids actually do go to bed fairly early (between 7 and 7:30); I think the parents just need to go to bed earlier so we aren't so doggone tired every morning...

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