Yellow Wallpaper

I've been tagged by two different people for two different things, so I think I'll put them both in one post. First of all, Amyjane tagged me with this unusual one about books. * Find the nearest book to you. * Name the book and author. * Turn to page 123. * Go to the fifth sentence on the page. * Copy out the next 3 sentences and post to your blog. * Tag someone else. Unfortunately, I'm in the midst of wild thesis writing and am not currently reading anything for fun at all. Just boring books, like: Contemporary Spanish Film From Fiction by Thomas Deveny "Nevertheless, Juanita, Carlos's lover and a member of the troupe, succinctly captures their misery with the lament, " Tengo hambre , Carlos" (I'm hungry Carlos). She later complains " Esto no es un oficio , Carlos. Somos vagabundos " (This is not an occupation, Carlos. We're bums.), and says that people prefer the movies, and she does too. Ironically, she abandons Carlos "w...

We are quite proud of your new ability to stand up and understand that it is very exciting for you too. Your crib really is a wonderful place to practice this new trick, since it has a nice rail at the perfect height for holding on to. It's even pretty cute that you delight so much in standing up and rocking the crib so it bangs against the wall. However, three o'clock in the morning is not the time to practice this new trick. Do you remember a few weeks ago when you learned to lie down quietly in your crib and fall asleep all by yourself? We really liked that trick a lot. It did not include any standing up, spitting your pacifier across the room, and wailing because you don't know how to get down and back to sleep. So, please, let's save the standing up for daytime hours so Mommy and Daddy can get some sleep and you can too. Otherwise we may have to sell you to the circus.

We have decided to still go on our wild and crazy adventure for spring break, which will include driving to San Francisco, then to Orem, then back up to Seattle. With two small children in the backseat. Because we're insane, that's why. I haven't been all that excited about this trip (see above). Then I decided to Google one of my favorite restaurants in Berkeley. I remember this place fondly from many College Bowl trips down there. And they're still open and still serving crepes! I'm already trying to decide between ham, egg and cheddar or smoked turkey with avocado and bacon. Mmmm.... Even better, guess what's just around the corner? I think that Master Fob and Thmazing can go have fun while Lady Steed and I eat our crepes. I guess some things are worth driving twelve hours for after all.

Arrive at church late, even though I woke up quite early. Instead of jumping in the shower right away I lounged on the i nternet reading NY Times Sunday content. Because I am mad at myself I arrive at church in a bad mood. Spend most of sacrament meeting alternating between feeling really nauseated by the strong smell of cigarette smoke coming from the person in front of me and feeling really bad about not wanting to sit by them ever again. Laugh at the newly married guy who confesses that the recent fireside he and his wife attended was "the first Institute activity I ever went to where I wasn't checking out girls." Just about as funny as the poor guy in our last ward who told the entire ward he got his wife pregnant on their wedding night. Reflect on the fact that even though this guy and his wife both just got married at 28 and that's not all that old by worldly standards, they're probably both now really relieved because that's a long time to wait by Mo...

As I'm sure you might have figured out, I don't read any decorating magazines or even attempt to fancy up my house (for example, I think a cardboard box makes a great living room accessory). But I did see a fun idea for decorating with kids' artwork a little while ago and decided to try it out. Especially since it was so easy: two thumbtacks, a piece of twine, and these adorable mini clothespins I found at Storeables : Then this morning I slaved over a hot stove and produced two fabulosas tortillas espanolas for our ward's International Dinner: Since that wasn't enough slaving, I let S-Boogie talk me into making a cake in honor of her grandma's birthday yesterday. She voted for chocolate cupcakes with vanilla frosting and sprinkles and had a great time helping me make and eat them. (You can see that we tried putting cinnamon heart candies on one of the cupcakes, but S-Boogie decided they were "too spicy" so we switched to sprinkles). I love cooking ...

First of all, thanks to everyone for your kind and encouraging comments. I actually feel better now that I got a lot of that off ugly, negative crap out of my head. Now I just need to remind myself next time I start freaking out: "You already said this. There's not anything else you can do." We are still coming to Utah for a week during our spring break. We thought we would have nearly three weeks off due to a lack of finals and such, but the fact that Master Fob is still employed has changed our plans a bit. We love the fact that he still has a job and that we still have steady income until June, but I think both of us really need a vacation. I'm so looking forward to the day when school is done and he just has one job, hopefully one with vacation time and reasonable hours. For example, our "holiday" weekend included Master Fob going to class all day on Saturday, working Sunday night, and working Monday afternoon. Sigh. But, I am taking action to get this t...

I woke up this morning feeling shaky, both physically and mentally. It's probably related to the vagaries of my monthly cycle, but it's still hard to deal with. Also , editorgirl's post today really hit a sore spot for me. I'm getting really tired of my thesis ruling my life and making me feel totally worthless and incompetent. I know that isn't rational, but I'm not feeling very rational today. I feel that same fear, that I really can't write a thesis and that this proves that I never should have attended grad school in the first place. I'm tired of feeling the weight of all the wrong choices I've made and all the things I should have done. I should have been planning on grad school before finishing my undergrad and gotten more of the prerequisites out of the way. I should have jumped on my thesis idea right away, done the research, and written my prospectus before the end of my first year. I shouldn't have panicked and dropped my classes that ...

1. I broke my left wrist twice while I was growing up. 2. I don't get grossed out by very many things, but other people's spit makes me want to gag. I can't be in the bathroom when someone else is brushing their teeth because I want to throw up. 3. I didn't like Oreos until I was in college. 4. I don't like strong cheeses, pesto sauce, or raw onion. 5. I also don't like sushi or most Japanese food because I can't stand the taste of nori (seaweed). 6. I have never skipped school. 7. I've never been to a BYU football game. 8. My parents didn't have a television until I was about eight years old. 9. I used to be a card-carrying member of The American Cetacean Society . 10. I've never seen Newsies , Annie , or Anne of Green Gables. 11. I met Chuck Woolery when I was 12 and he gave me some fake money from Scrabble . 12. I have a widow's peak. 13. When I was in high school I grew out my bangs, but because of the widow's peak a small section...

This afternoon I was getting ready to go to the store and realized that our little shopping cart was no longer sitting on our porch where Master Fob had left it last week. I know that it's foolish to leave such a valuable and necessary item sitting out tempting people to take it, but I didn't think anyone would really do it. Well, someone out there really is that rude. Because I needed to get milk I ended up taking the shopping cart home from the store with me. I took it right back, but I still felt trashy doing that. Then I started cooking dinner and realized that I had forgotten to buy brown rice, a key ingredient in tonight's "Middle Eastern lentils and rice" (it's actually quite tasty). S-Boogie was feeling restless, so she got her rain gear out and accompanied me to the store to get a bag of rice. Once dinner was in the oven I started to make the salad. When I opened the fridge I couldn't find the bag of salad that I'd put in there last night. I w...

After a flurry of posting last week things have slowed down a bit. This week has been rather boring so far. Little Dude is feeling completely better from his ear infection, though the antibiotic has given him a touch of diarrhea and diaper rash. This isn't a good combo with his inability to lie on his back for more than thirty seconds at a time and I've spent way too much time wrestling a dirty, stinky baby lately. I also managed to develop a weird rash due to my overzealous application of prescription-strength cortisone cream. But it's feeling much better and I've learned to read the side effects carefully before using prescriptions. S-Boogie got to attend her first ever Valentine's party at school this afternoon. The kids ran around and ate cookies while the parents stood around and talked. I was feeling exhausted from staying up too late last night and from a long afternoon without Master Fob, and I don't really know any of the parents yet. Plus they intimida...

Master Fob has spent this quarter working for the admissions office reading applications. This has been a great job not just for the flexible hours and good pay, but also because they pay his tuition for him. Unfortunately, it was just for this quarter and then we didn't have a plan beyond that point. He just emailed me to say that they want him to come back next quarter to read transfer applications. Such a wonderful blessing! One of the things I admire most about Master Fob is that he works hard and works well at whatever job he has. During our entire relationship he's always managed to have at least one or two good jobs. I've noticed that he always makes a good impression and we've been blessed for it. He's sincere, dedicated, smart, and just a nice guy. This does, however, probably change our plans a bit. We have been tentatively planning a big road trip for the entire two weeks of spring break, which would involve us visiting San Francisco, Las Vegas and Utah...

Yesterday afternoon we filed our Federal taxes online (did you know that Washington has no state income tax? another good reason to live here). This morning we got email notification that our return had been rejected because my birth date does not match what the Social Security people have for me. This is the third year this has happened. The first time I called someone to try and find out what was going on. Apparently when I changed my name after getting married someone hit the wrong key and managed to change my birthday as well. The guy on the phone refused to tell me what they thought my birthday was, but when I told him what it really is he said they didn't match. We decided to just mail in our return (they need them to match when you're doing it online). Last year I finally got around to going down to the Social Security office and filling out their paperwork. We successfully filed online. Apparently something didn't work because it's not happening this year. The ...

I love checking the mail. I never know what kind of fun surprises will be in there to brighten my day. What I really hate, though, is when I'm expecting something to come and it seems to take forever to show up. Today was a very happy day because our mailbox finally delivered some fabulous things: The last W2 we need for filing our taxes. Official notification that S-Boogie and Little Dude are switched back to the HMO that covers their doctor. They got switched for a month or so and were assigned to a clinic across town. Um, no thank you. Insurance card for me and official paperwork. Now I can file a claim for our counseling sessions and get some of our money back. Yay ! New buckle for the baby backpack I got off craigslist the other week. Double yay ! And a thank-you card from Bawb and Ambrosia. It's nice when people are thoughtful like that. I think I'm going to go make some cookies, so that when Master Fob gets home we can file our taxes online and eat warm chocolate c...

I keep finding interesting sites and articles and thinking that I want to write a blog post about them, but then I never get around to doing it. So today you get a variety of links that I wanted to pass on and collected in one single post. Enjoy! Interesting article about energy conservation . Inspired by our insane electric bill for the last two months. Stupid electric heat. Unfortunately we can't do many of the things mentioned in the article since we don't own our apartment, but maybe we will change our light bulbs over and see if that shaves a few dollars off. My mom wrote a cool post about February . I liked this post and the comments (and I recommend reading Segullah ). And my friend Ken wrote a really funny response to that stupid email about Barack Obama. My sister emailed me a good article about the Muslim world. I was writing a post about why I don't like Disney Princesses, but this lady said it a lot better than I could. For some cool ways that people do more g...

It's an innocent question, but I still hate answering it. I usually say "California", even though I haven't been back there for over ten years now. These days I often reply "we've been in Utah for a while, but I'm originally from California". I know a lot of people have had nomadic childhoods as well, so I don't know why it's so hard for me to just say "I moved around a bit" (sometimes I do). I was born in San Diego and we lived there until I was eight. I have lots of fond memories of San Diego: Sea World, the beach, our funky house with the pepper trees in the yard, the house with a macadamia tree, our other house with the cholo neighbors who raised pit bulls in the back yard, beautiful weather, the zoo, Balboa Park, the smell of oleander blossoms, eating Chinese food at the Peking Cafe, flying kites and riding the carousel at Seaport Village, and so many other memories that I can hardly name them all. The year I turned eight, my ...

I wasn't in a very good mood during sacrament meeting yesterday. Our bench was crowded and S-Boogie wasn't cooperating much with the "sit still and keep your clothes on" rule. Little Dude had been up for most of the night screaming about his ear and we'd all woken up late. Then testimonies started, and yesterday honestly wasn't much of an uplifting meeting. We had the guy who had a talk he really wanted to give to the youth, the random non-member (I think) relating her really long life story in broken English, and the bitter ranter who gets up frequently to engage in his own form of group therapy from the pulpit. We started to go overtime and my butt started to hurt from the bench. Then we finally got to the closing song: Savior, may I learn to love thee, Walk the path that thou hast shown, Pause to help and lift another, Finding strength beyond my own. Who am I to judge another When I walk imperfectly? In the quiet heart is hidden Sorrow that the eye can’t se...

I was going to read some blogs and newspaper articles, work on my thesis a little, and then go to bed by 10:30 like a good girl. Then I called my mom and talked for too long. And then Little Dude got up and I had to put him back to bed. Then I had to eat ice cream. Then the computer froze up and I reset it. And then I got nervous again about it crashing, so I started backing up our photos on CD (I've been meaning to do that for a while). Then I remembered that we've been meaning to put actual names on our video files so we know what they are. Then I got engrossed in watching video of S-Boogie from 2 years ago (she really has grown up!). And then it got really late and I realized that I need to go to bed. Only instead of going to bed, I paused to blog about it. I will probably hate myself tomorrow.

This should be the last post about hemmorhoids for the time being (I make no promises about the future, but I promise that I'll lay off for a while after this). So, I had my appointment with the doctor today. First of all, you should know that when I am nervous I tend to either get angry or giddy. Today I was kind of giddy, especially after sitting around the waiting room for an hour reading Ladies Home Journal and Sunset . Then they sent me back to the little room and I had to take off most of my clothes and sit around half-naked for another half an hour. I actually didn't see the doctor first; he sent in the resident to interview me and take a quick look at my bottom. She reassured me "You'll really like Dr. W, he's very nice and not really like a doctor at all." Then he came in and I almost started laughing. You see, when I hear "proctologist", I think grandfather-type old guy with white hair. Dr. W was only a few years older than me, wears dark ...